Sunday, 7 February 2016

Why Should We Marry?

Hello Readers, Happy Propose Day :). Hope you celebrated Rose Day in a unique manner with your special one friends, family and anyone who plays an important role in your life. I am back again with a new thought. Read ahead and let me know your views, be it good or bad, I will accept it. 

So, it's Propose Day and time to propose the one whom you love the most and wish to be your life partner. Well, before you think of tieing the knots; have a clear idea on why you are doing so? Is it your wish? Are you ready for the same? Or Are you doing this just because you adhere to society norms and conditions.... 

Our Indian culture has strong importance for marriage but I don’t understand whether individuals get married for own self or for the sake of the society. I have seen many individuals who don’t want to get married but just because their parents insist they get married.

Even worse I have seen some of my male friends getting tensed because they don’t get right partner at the right age. Now, here I want to clarify that there’s nothing like right age. But our concept behind marriage is different and hence we are dying hard to get “settled” at the right age.

Most of us get married for Sex because in India Sex before marriage is not allowed. This is our mind set. There’s no such rule like that. I will discuss later on what our legal rules say. Now, taking things ahead, basically a general thought prevails in our mind i.e. get married early get children early.

Again here, society plays an important role” first child Male”. To satisfy this condition, I cannot explain what turmoil a woman has to suffer from. Today, when I take a look at certain families; their last child is Male and just you ask the reason for it, you will get this reply: It is necessary to have one male child in family”.

In short, we get married for the society; we decide our children based on society norms. So, where’s the individuals’ personal feeling here, where has it lost? Does anyone think what he/she wants in life? What are his/her interests? What he/she wants to do in life? No. Such questions are thrown away.

Every individual has to live in the same cycle:
“Take birth> enjoy three years > go to school > Study till 12th > Complete Graduation/ Post graduation > Find a job > Settler or not, happy or not but get married> Keep fulfilling family responsibilities> Get older > Gather finance for children’s marriage, study etc > and what’s the end: If earning is good, stay with children or else leave for old age home.”

So, where is your freedom? Where are you? Did God gave you birth to get stuck in this circle? Where you enjoyed your own time? These questions remain unanswered because some of us have never ever thought of them.

Ask anyone, they will say it is mandatory to live in this cycle. No, there are no such legal rules for the same then how can it be mandatory?

What is more important Career or Marriage?

According to me, Career is more important than Marriage because if you have sound financial status then  you can spend good life with your family. I have seen couples saying “Only one Kid” why because there’s inflation and you cannot afford to rear more than one. There are very rare who think of India's population. Till now, in my life I haven't seen those who think about population and have one child. 

No friends, we are not that selfless to think about Nation. We just think about ourselves. 

What I say is why don’t you make yourself capable first and then get involved in such stuffs. Why you want to give birth to a single child and keep it alone for whole of its life. Why are you becoming so selfish? Again here, society comes in the middle: “It is mandatory to have children after marriage”.

How can you guarantee that this child will have good cousins, good friends? What if he/she doesn’t? Why to leave him/her to spend a lonely life?  Here, I would like to say my Parents are really great. Let me explain you why:

When I was 8 years old, say in 3rd STD, I saw all my classmates had at least one sibling and I was like feeling alone. So, I said to them: I need a brother or sister (at that time we are not mature to understand things).

When I was 10 years old, I got my sister. My mom was 37 that time and she was suffering from Asthma, doctor clearly said it’s risky but my mom took that risk for me and gave a gift “My Sister”.  Today, I am really thankful to them because they gave me a very good gift who is my best buddy in this world. I salute their selflessness.

Yes, my mom is a kind of person who has a feeling to have one baby boy in the family but she never regrets us nor she shows any kind of sadness for not having a male child. Today, she is suffering from paralysis and at this moment, she says “My one girl is equal to 100 boys”.

Well, here are some statistics that will show you what l am saying really matters: 

I just want to say that:

Live your life your own way; not as per society norms.

Marry only if you want to irrespective of the age.

Every age is good for everything.

Do what you want to because no one will be with you on your death bed.

Think my readers, think about this. Yes, marriage is important but only when you are ready mentally, physically and find yourself capable enough to satisfy yourselves as well as your partner and children (At least two) and if you don’t want; its fine you two can enjoy a good lavish life.

But I request not to get stuck in these society norms and hurt your selves. Do what your heart says. Do what is of top priority to you and not to the society.

Note:  These are just my views and there’s no resemblance to anyone’s life or situations or circumstances. If there’s any then it is a mere coincidence.  Everyone’s opinion may differ however seeing the situation that youngsters are facing today, I decided to write this blog and with my story I have just tried to give a new direction to those who really believe “Life is what you want to make it, it is not struggle every time but yes if you want to make it a struggle , it is!.”


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